Funny Jokes For Girlfriend

Santa k dono kaan jal gaye
doctor : tumharey kaan kese jaly ?
Santa : main qameez istari kar raha tha ke phone aa gaya.
Main ne jaldi main phone ki jagah istari kaan ko laga li..!
Doctor : to doosra kaan kese jala ?
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Santa : ab ambulance ko bhi phone karna tha na..

Girl: Will u marry me?
Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai.
Mummy ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se.................funniest jokes

Narad says to all wives :
if ur husband sends u very romantic msgs then be very happy, but think who is sending those msgs to ur husband ?
My job is over ........

funniest jokes hindi | funniest hindi jokes |

God to pappu :- beta kya chahiye.??
Pappu :- ek job,ek badi si gaadi.. Aur usme dher sari ladkiya,
God :- tathastu.
Aaj pappu girl's school me bus driver hai...
Soch samajh k maango,bhagwan bhi smart hai.

shaadi main ek smart ladka ladki se: aap dance karogi..
ladki sharma k boli: "yes."
ladka pyar se bola: to phir aapki "kursi" main le jaon behan..??
moral: har ladka kamina nai hota........................funniest jokes

Teacher:" Isko translate koro: "ladki kapde pehen chuki hai."
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All Boys ek sath me bole:" Ohhhhh... Shit...... We are late."

Gabbar: Ye Haath Mujhe de de, Thakur.
Thakur: Le le... mere haath lele... Basanti ke bhi le le... Jai aur Veeru ke bhi lele... Ramu Kaka ke bhi le le...
Octopus ban ja, Kutte!
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Gabbar: Sorry yaar, tu to emotional ho geya!

Train me ek husband apni wife se ..
Tujhse shaadi karke pachta raha hu ,
dil karta hai tujhe kutto ke aage daal du ..
Saamne wala passenger……
Bhow, bhow bhow, bhow......funniest jokes in hindi

Girl to teacher: ye pyaar kya hota hai sir ??
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Teacher: jab tum badi ho kar achi ladki banogi to tumhe 1 pyar karne wala milega.
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Girl: agar achi na bani to ?
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Teacher: to bohat saray milenge

Ek village mei aaj bhi films ka advt. cycle rickshaw se announce hota h..
Ek din kuch aisa announce ho raha tha.. Film ka naam - "bade ghar ki beti..." "bade ghar ki beti ka mazaa lijiye,
din mei chaar baar, 9 se 12, 12 se 3, 3 se 6 aur raat 9 se 12..baje tak... Aage ka 20 rupaye, peeche ka 10 rupaye..

Suhagrat pe ladka bivi ko sirf kiss kr k so gaya.
Subah maa boli,"Bahu, mandir jane se pehle naha lo
Bahu- gusse me Sirf brush kr leti hu maji, baki sb fresh hai.

Dear ad makers,
not everything we do is to impress women.
We buy bikes to commute and deodorants to avoid body odor.
Sincerely,
men's association

School: ye duniya ye mehfil mere kaam ki nahi…
tution: idher chala main udher chala janey kahan main kidher chala.. .
Maths: ajeeb daastaan hai ye kahan shuru kahan khatam..
Science: aa khushi se khud khushi karle…
exam: choti choti raatein lambi ho jaati hain.. .
Result : jab dil hi toot gaya ham jeeke kya kare…
pass: aaj lagta hai main hawa mein hoon aaj itni khushi mili hai…
fail: chann se jo tootey koi sapna jag soona soona laagay…

A frustrated husband in front of his laptop:
dear google, please do not behave like my wife...
Please allow me to complete my sentence before you start guessing & suggesting...

Wo sadak ke us paar thi
Main sadak ke is paar tha
Kuch wo aage badhi
Kuch main aage badha
Aur kuch aage wo badhi
Aur kuch aage main badha
Kuch aur wo aage badhi
Kuch aur aage main badha
Aab wo sadak ke is paar thi
Aur main sadak ke us paar tha.. funny jokes for girlfriend

Dad - Badi hokar kya karogi?
Daughter - Maa Banungi, Padhai Karungi, Shaadi Karungi
Dad - Tu kuch bhi kar par thoda Sequence ka Dhyaan rakhna !!!

Mareez- umar lambi karne ka koi tareeqa bataiye.
Doctor- shaadi kar lo.
Mareez- is se umar lambi ho jayegi ?
Doctor- nahi, par do faayde hain
1) lambi zindagi ki khwahish khatam ho jayegi
2) bachi khuchi zindagi lambi lagne lagegi ...............very funny marriage jokes

What Is Another Painful Sentence Other Than ‘I Hate U’
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I Finished Studying, u Finished? Hurts A Lot...

Pappu ne hajamat ki dukan kholi..
Ek aadmi shave karane aya.
Pappu :- muchh rakhni hai
aadmi - haan
pappu (mucch kaat ke) - le rakh le, jahan rakhni hai.

Bachha ghar se maar kha ke school jaa raha tha
Kisi ne pucha- beta padte ho ??
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Bachha- nahi school ki uniform pehen ke baarat me jaa
raha hu chalega ?

Ek din Galib scooter se jaa rahe the,
Samne 1 bachha aa gaya....
galib ne farmaya
'Ankho me jal rahe hai unki yadoo ke deep,
Hat ja chotu.. peep..peep..peep'

Banta To His Son :
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Oye, Ghabrana Matt,
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Tu Sher Da Puttar Hai...
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Son : Ji Haan Papa,
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Class Me Teacher Bhi Yehi Bolti Hai,
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Ki Tu Zarur Kisi Jaanwar Ki Aulad Hai......................funniest jokes sms

Govt. has passed a new rule ...
Beautiful girls & handsome boys have to pay "Personality Tax" !
Don't smile,
I know you are safe but ...
meri to waat lag gayi na..

Boy: Call Me Shona
Girl: Shona..
B: Call Me Sweetheart
G: Sweetheart..
B: Call Me Honey
G: Honey..
B: Gadhe ki bachhi call kar mujhe!
Girl: Oh ok ok!....:.....................funny jokes for girlfriend

Phone ke rishte bhi bade ajeeb hote hain,
balance rakhkar bhi log ajeeb hote hain,
khud to sms msg karte nahi hain,
muft ke sms msg padhne ke kitne shoqin hoti hai......

Zindgi ki Shuruat 'S' Se hoti hai.
S- for Suraj,
S- Subah,
S- Sham,
S- Swagat,
S- Samay
Uske bad
S- Sagai
Phir Shadi Phir Sas,
Sasur,
Sali,
Sala
Phir Satyanas!

I cried when i failed in 2 subjects,
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But
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I smiled when i came to know my friend failed in 5 subjects