:: Husband and Wife Jokes ::
pati- hipnotis kya hota hai?
patni-kisiko apne control mai kr k apne marji ka kaam krwana.
pati-chal jhuti!!!! use to shaadi kehte hai..
Pati: are suno, munna ro raha hai chup karao ise.
patni (gusse mein):main kaam karu ya bachche sambhaalu,
main ise dahez mein nahin laayi thi, khud hi chup kara lo.
Pati : phir rone de....
main kaunasa ise baaraat mein lekar gaya tha..
ek baar ek pati aur patni Bagiche me haath me haath daale ghoom rahe the . usee time ek Sharaarati-Natkhat bachcha vaha se gujara aur bola Uncle, kal vaali jyaada mast cute H0T thi. Pati chaar din se khaali pet bageeche mein us bachche ko dhoondh raha hai.
Wife ko 1 thappad maarane kee saja 1000 rupaye judge saahab ne sunaee..
tab santa ne judge ko puchha :-"dusara ek thappad maar du..??
judge gusse se :- kyo..??
santa :- kyonki chhutta nahin hai mere paas 2000 rupaye ka note hai.
:: Latest Husband and Wife Jokes ::
chor-tmhare pass jo kuch bhi hai fata fat de do.
admi-bhai,aisa maat karo,agar mai khali hath gaya to meri bivi mujhe khacha
chaba jayegi..
chor-agar mai khali pahucha to kya meri bivi mujhe taal k khayegi....??
WIFE - "suna hai swarg mein husband-wife ko saath nahi rahne dete?"
Husband - "Pagli iseeliye to use SWARG(Heaven) kahte hain . !!!"
:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::
admi shadi kyu krta hai?
marne k baad woh swarg mai jaye to acha feel kare ,aur nark mai jaye to apne
ghar jaisa feel kare....
ek admi ki nye nye shadi hue,phir bhi sham mai use ghr
jane ki koi jaldi nahi rehti,woh der tak office mai hi rehta tha
boss ne pucha kya baat hai
ushne ne bataya ki meri bivi bhi job krti hai,aur jo ghar jaldi jata hai khana bhi usi ko banana padeta hai
Asali khagolashaastri to parivaar mein hi hote hai,
1 Maa - jo bachapan mein chaand dikhaati thi.
Doosare Papa - jo 1 thappad mein saara brahmaand dikha dete the.
Tisari patni/Wife - jo din mein taare dikhaati hai. Ye NASA to sirph bhram hai.
:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::
3 sharabi apas mai baat kr rahe the ki kaun apni bivi kitna control mai rakhta hai..
unme se 3 chup tha?
2no ne puch kya hua?
3 bola kaal hi meri bivi ghutno k baal mere pass aye..
2no ne kaha shabas!!!
3- aur mujhe boli agar mard ho to bed k niche se niklo....
:: Best Husband and Wife Jokes ::
patni 1/2 hr se phone pekisi se baat kr rahi thi,ushne call cut kr diya..
pati-aaj tmne bahut jaldi call cut kr diya..
patni-wrong no tha ishliye
patni-apne pati ki kabr pe pankha kr rahi thi..
ek admi ne bola-behan ji ab ishpe pankha kr k kya fayda
patni-hmare yaha ek rule hai jab tak pati ki kabr sukh nhi jati,tab tak patni
ki dusari shadi nhi ho sakti...
ek admi apni patni ka antimsanshkar kr k ghar aa raha tha
tahi jor se bijli kadki,badal garje or jor se barish hue
dukhi admi ne apne sath chal rhe logo se kaha-- lagta hai pahuch gaye..
ek admi ko cncer hua tha
ek din ushk beta ne pucha-papa apko cancer hai phir bhi ap logo se keh rahe
hai ki apko Aids hai..
pita ne jwab diya-taki mere marne k baad koi tmhari mummy ko chune ki himmat na kare...
:: Husband and Wife Jokes ::
ek kuwe ki manyata thi ki sikka dal kr mano kamna puri ho jati thi..
ek pati patni waha gaye
pati ne sikka dala aur kuwe k pass se haat gaya..
patni gaye aur woh kuwe pass juki sikka dalne k liye aur gir gaye ..
pati thodi der sant tha aur bhi bola-- itni jaldi ye to chamatkar hai.....
:: Husband and Wife Jokes ::
ek pati apni patni ko yeh keh kr chidata tha- 3 bacho ki amma
patni ko bahut gussa ata tha
ek din jaise hi pati ne bola 3 bacho ki amma
patni ne turant jwab diya bolo- 2 bacho k papa..
techr ne chote bache se pucha"bhagwan kaha hai"?
ek bache ne bola mujhe pata hai..
techr-batao
bacha-bathroom mai.
techr-ek pal k liye chup thi....phir boli tmhe kaise pata?
bacha-roj subah jab papa uthte hai.bathroom ka darwaja knock krte hue kehte
hai ."Hey Bhagwan!tm ab tak andar hi ho...
pati patni ek bhed bahre bus mai ja rahe the
pati ek ladki pass jakar saat k khada ho gaya,yeh dekh kr patni ko jalan hue..
achanak ush ladi ne ek chata mara,aur kaha lo maja ek ladki to chikoti katne ki'
pati ne patni ko safaye dete hue kaha maine chikoti nhi kati..
patni muskura k bolo -mujhe pata hai,kyuki maine kiya tha yeh sab....
:: New Husband and Wife Jokes ::
ek admi ne waiter ko 100rs tip diye
waiter-ap k liye mai roj shaam ko kone wali table reserve rakhunga
admi-maine tmhe ishliye tip di hai jab bhi mai apni patni k satha au to tm
kehna table khali nhi hai,to mai use kisi saste se hotel mai le jaunga
:: New Husband and Wife Jokes ::
pati patni bade hi khusi se reh rhe the...unki 25 aniversry thi
news reporter unk ghar gaye woh bahut famus couple the
reporter-ap k bech kabhi ladai nhi hoti?
pati-hm honeymoon pe gaye the.. mai aur meri patni horse pe baith k ghum rahe the...
bivi k horse ne use gira diya to meri bivi ne bola- pehli bar,aur woh phir
use horse pe chad gye
horse ne phir giraya to boli- dusari bar,aur phir chad gye
horse ne phir giraya-kuch nhi boli,gun nikala aur horse ko mar diya
maine bola yeh tmne kya kiya,kyu mar diya,to ushne bola pehli bar
tab se hm santi se reh rahe hai
If newly weds are called
Love Birds..
What do you call the couples married for years??
Angry Birds?
Wife:- How will u feel when i go to my maika sweetie?
Husband:- mauka... mauka.......to love.....
kisi ne bade pyaar se shaadishuda aadami se poochha,
"raat ko Online kab aate ho?"
dard ki deevaarei hil gayi jab usanen kaha,
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bartan dhone ke baad.
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