Court Order !!
U R Accused of Crawling into my inbox &
Hijacking My Smile with your cute massages.
U R Sentenced 2b MY SWEET FRIEND 4 LIFE TIME.

Sardar ji jab exam dene gaye toh woh
apne saath Plumber ko kyun le gaye?
Kyunki Sardarji ko information mili thi
k Paper leak ho gaya hai:

Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It’s already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go

Life is like a MOVIE
If u r sad DRAMA
If u r afraid SUSPENSE
If u r angry ACTION
When u look at the mirror HORROR

Bruce Lee’s favorite,
VEGETABLE: MU LEE
BREAKFAST: ID LEE
FESTIVAL: DIVA LEE
ACTRESS: SONA LEE
MUSIC: QWAA LEE
MOVIE: COO LEE No. 1
ANIMAL: BIL LEE
TIMEPASS: KHUJ LEE

Santa: Aaj men ne 1 jan bachai
Banta: Woh Kaisay?
Santa: Vo aise k ek Faqir ko pucha
1000 ka note dun to kya karega
Wo Bola
Khushi se mar jaunga
Me ne kaha ja nahi deta

Sardar proposed a Girl……
Girl said “Im 1 yearr elder to you………..
Sardar said Oye No Problem Soniye,
Ill marry you NEXT YEAR..:

   ;****;
o( @..@ )o
   “(—)”
Paichan kaun?
Bandar bi nai,
Monkey bhi nai,
Tumhare bachpan ki photo hai.

In apptitude test:
Teacher:In which state is river Kaveri.
.
Sardar:In “Liquid state”.

Doctor : Apka weight kitna hai?
Patient: Chashme ke sath 75 kgs.
Doctor : Aur bina chashme ke?
Patient: Woh bina chasme ke toh mujhe dikhta hi nahi.

Doctor: U Look Exactly LIke My Third Wife.
Lady: How Many Wives Do You Have?
Doc : Two...
MoRaL : Express Smart Ideas , SmarTLy .

In the exam hall.
Examiner : why you wrote the formula in your hand.
Student : Because my master told me that, formulas must be on finger tips.

A student was asked 2 write
a signboard 4 the traffic rules
near da college campus
He wrote:-
“Drive Carefully! Don’t kill the students, wait for the Teachers”

Man to Hotel Manager : Jaldi Chalo, Meri Wife Khirki se kudh kar jaan dena chahti hai.
Manager : So .. Sir What can I Do?
Man : Abey Saale ! Khirki nahi khul rahi.

How a woman calls her husband in first 6 years:
Yr 1. Janu
Yr 2. O G.
Yr 3. Aji, sunte ho?
Yr 4. Arey, O Bunty k pappa
And then…..
Yr 5. Kahan mar gaye?
Yr 6. Tum aate ho k main aaon?

1 Over me Kitne Balls Peke Jate hai
Kya apne kaha 6?
Galat jawab
1 over me 1 hi ball 6 bar feka jata he
Bade aye!
Cricket k shokeeeen!

cat:hw old r u?
elpht:5yrs
cat:but u looking big
elpht:i m a complan boy
cat:i m 30yrs
elpht:but u look so smll
cat:i m a jhandu kesri jivan
badhti umar mano tham si jaye

ji karta hai,
apke pas aau,
apke pas aa k zara ruk jau.!!!!!!!!
na bolu, na baithu...
Bus apki ankho me ..
santre ka chilka nichor kr bhag jau.

Baith kr mehbuba ki julfo k saye me aisa josh aya..
wah wah..
wah wah..
fir kya hua??
Wife ne dekh liya aur ICU me hosh aya..

What does ILU means?

I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu…
tum kya samjhey they…

I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon