Punam ki rat me chand badal jata hai, Waqt ke sath insan
badal jata hai, Sochte hai ki apko tang na kare, Magar sochte sochte plan
badal jata hai..!.................Hindi funny sms

Tappu khet mein pet khaali kar raha tha,
usane do baar hava chhoni Gasing Ki.....
Purr...
Purr....
ek suar aur usaka beta ye sab dekh rahe the .
Beta -"maan, mujhe bhookh lagi hai..."
Suar - ruk ja beta, 1 siti aur lagane de...

Boyfriend requested to God- Hazaro ki kismat tere hath H,
Agr pass karde to kya bat H.
God-Galfrnds thodi kam, patata to kya bat thi,
Kitabe to sari tere pass thi.....chutkule in hindi

Delhi vaale ne Utatar pradesh ke ladake se puchha yaar..
ye IPL mein tumhaari uttar pradesh ke team kyon nahin kheleti...
uttar pradesh vaala ladaka :
abe sab kriket khelenge to satta kaun khelega re....ekdum naya fresh new IPL Cricket jokes chutkula

Santa went to interview for FBI agent.
Interviewer: “who killed Bruce Lee?”
Santa: “Thanks for giving the job sir, I would immediately start investigation.“

Mohabbat love ke kharcho ki badi lambi kahaani hai, kabhi Film dikhaani
hai to kabhi shopping karaani hai, Mastar roj kahata hai kahaan hai
Fee ke paise? use Samajhaoon main kaise ki mujhe chhori Pataani hai! ladki pataani hai chutkule

Funny sms, jokes, chutkule in Hindi

Dimag jiska "ICE", Jivan uska "NICE"
Dil jiska "PURE", safalta mile "Sure"
Najar jiski "CLEAR", Wo bane sabka "Dear" Aisa kaun aur kahan - Main Hu Na.............................chutkule

Mahila-jal ki tarah taral-sheetal hoti hai
Purush-mitti ki tarah thos-rookha hota hai
aur
Jab donon ki shaadi/wedding hoti hai
keechad ho jaata hai re baaba//wedding jokes in hindi/shaadi chutkule in hindi

Jaat Painting kharidane gaya…
Dukaandaar: yah 20,000 rupaye ki hai.
Oil paint se bani hui hai.
jaat: paison ki chinta mat kar...
desi ghee mein kuchh dikha...yaar!....funny chutkule in hindi

When you breathe, you respire!
Wah Wah! When you breathe, you respire!
Wah Wah!
When you don't breathe, you expire!

U r 100% beautiful,
u r 100% lucky
u r 100% sweet ,
u r 100% nice,
and u r 100% stupid to believe these words............jokes

Ek BAAR SMS KAR KE TO DEKHO,
INBOX NA BHAR DOON TO KEHNA,
EK BAAR MISS CALL KAR KE TO DEKHO, BATTERY DOWN NA KAR DOON TO KEHNA, EK BAAR NAZDEEK AA KAR TO DEKHO, HAATH NA THAAM LOON TO KEHNA.

main ooske pyaar me ban gayaa baraf kaa gola....... main ooske pyaar me ban gaya baraf kaa gola..... aur woh bewafaa bolti hai thanda matlab cocacola..............chutkule

Taxi driver: Mam, u r the 3rd pregnant lady whom I'm dropping to Airport today.
Lady: But I'm not pregnant.
Driver: But we havn't reached airport yet.

Wives r Incoming Calls
Lovers r Outgoing Calls
Aunties r Tollfree Calls
Callgirls r Roaming Calls
Neighbour Girls r Missed Calls.................very funny jokes on girls

Bhakt : Baba Shaadi ko 7 saal ho gaye
Bacha nahi huaa
Nirmal baba : Biwi k saath Kab soya tha
Bhakt :Baba roj sota hu.
Baba : 2,4 Din padosiyo ko sone do Kripa Hogi..!! mastiful chutkule.....mast....jokes

School Mein Ishq Ka Naya Mahool Tyar Ho Gaya, Class Ki Teacher Ko RAJA Se Pyar Ho Gaya. Iss Baat Se Sari Class Ka Dil Udas Ho Gaya, Sari Class Fail, Aur..... RAJA Pass Ho Gaya..................mast chutkule

Jija: Sali ji, aapke yahan ki sabse mash-hoor cheez kaunsi hai? Sali: Jija ji, jo mash-hoor thi, usey to aap le gaye!................mast chutkule

The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
it functions 24hrs 365 days.....
it functions right from the time u r Born....until you fall in love..................jokes on love

Mangta hoon to deti nahin ho: JAWAB MERI BAAT KA
Deti ho to khada ho jata hai: ROM-ROM JAZBAAT KA
Kyon bolti ho ke dheere se daalo: BALON MAIN PHOOL GULAB KA.................................................Hindi funny sms

If ever I was rude to u, If ever I was angry with u, If ever I misbehaved with u, than dont hesitate
JUST SLAP URSELF!
galti app ke he hogi.!!

1980 GIRL
Mama can I wear jeans.
Mama no beta log kia kahng ge

2018 GIRL
Mama can I wear miny skirts
Mama pahen meri bachi pahen kuch to pahen..................................very funny jokes on girls

GIRLS EXCUSES : PHONE MAT KARO DEAR MOM HOTI HAI NEAR, PAPA SE LAGTA HAI FEAR, BAAT BHI HOTI NAHI CLEAR, ISLIYE SMS, Whatsapp KARO DEAR WIHTOUT FEAR

Hi..
What happened..
My dear friends
Why no sms..
No balance..
Ok..!
I will send u
a recharge coupen:
||||||||||||||||
scrach with blade

Husband:
Ji krta hy Tumhri Zulfon men Kho jaon
Ankhon Me bus Jaun
Tumhari Bahon me Jhool Jaun
Wife:
Waheed Muraad he Rahoge Ya Kabhi
Imran Hashmi vi Bano gay.

This year is a mathematical operatin year of '1'
1+1=2 Add
1-1=0 Sub
1*1=1 Mul
1/1=1 Div
That is '2011'
Plz dont force me for nobel prize.
I Hate Publicity.;)

Gaanv ki ek ladaki ghar se bhaag gai..
3 din baad laut ke aai..
baap(gusse mein) : ab ka laive aai hai karamjali?
beti: patali pin kau Charger......chutkule in hindi

Kisi ne sach hi kaha hai ki zindagi sirf do din ki hai
"Saturday aur Sunday"
Yeh baat Monday ko samajh aati hai.

TIPS how to save 10 paisa per day.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Isme bhi interested ho..? Kasamm se yaar..
Kaha le jaoge itna bachakar...

Ek Admi Apne Bv K Hr Kam Me Nuks Nikalta Tha
Agr Wo Anda Boil Kr Deti To Kehta K Fry Krna Tha
Agr Fry Krti To Kehta K Boil Krna Tha
Ek Din Bv Ne Dono Bana diya
Pehle To Wo Dono Ando Ko Gaur Say Dekhta Raha
Phir Kehne Laga ..
"Tmhe Akl Kb ayegi.. Jis Anday Ko Fry Krna Tha Us Ko Boil Kr Dia Aur Jis Ko
Boil Krna Tha UsKo Fry..

1 larka Charas pi k aya,
Dad se bachne k liye bari si book lekr padhne laga!
Dad:Charas Pi k aya hai?
Son:Nhi To?
Dad:Kamine, Phir suitcase khol k kya bak-bak kr raha hai..

4 Pepsi “Sharukh”
4 Coke”Aamir”
4 Limca “Riya”
4 Fanta “Rani”
4 Thumps Up “Akshay”
Dont Worry Aap Ka Naam “Desi Daru” K liye

Once santa, Computer Science student, washing his hands with Dettol
.
.
.
.
.
. after removing a Virus from his System

Zindgi ke 7 Ahm kam-
1)Studies
2)Games
3)Entertainment
4)Love
5)..
6)..
7)..
??
Love ke Bad insan kisi bhi kam ka nahi rahta

Arz kiya hai..
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.
.
.
Ruthi hai wo iss tarah jaise hum
sach me unhe mana lenge...
.
.
.
.
.
itna waqt kaun zaya kare itne me hm dusri pata lenge...................................hindi funny sms

2 Aadamiyon ki beeveeyaan mele mein kho gaeen
jisame se 1 Hariyaana se tha aur 1 Delhi se
apani apani beevee dhoondhate hue vo aapas mein mile..!
Tumhaari vaali ki pahachaan? – Hariyaana vaale ne Delhi vaale se poochha.
Delhi vaala bola – 5’6″, gori, bhoori aankhen aur patali hai, sleeveless pink shirt aur laal mini skirt pahane hai. tumhaari wale ki kya pahachaan hai ?
Hariyaana vaala- mere wale ko maar goli, chaal teri dhoondhate hai Dost bechari paresan ho rahi hogi akele akele....

ladaka – shaadi karale mujhase …!
ladaki – kyoon ??
ladaka – mere paapa gaanv ke sabase bade aadamee hain …
shaadee ke baad ladaki ko pata chala ki ladake ka baap 102
saal ka hai* !

Aaliya bhatt ek dukaan mein gayi..
Aaliya : 2 bhk ka kya bhaav hai ?
Dukaanadaar: ye ready-made clothing store hai..
Aaliya : lekin baahar to likha hai “Flat 70% off”..
Dukaanadaar abhi bhi koma mein hai.

"DRINKS"
D-elicious aftr 1 Peg.
R-omantic aftr 2 peg.
I-nterested aftr 3 peg.
N-aughty aftr 4 peg.
K-ing aftr 5 peg.
S-nake aftr 6 peg..

Teacher: Make a sentence with 'Mohenjo-Daro'.
Happu Singh: Mohan Jo Daaru Tumhare Paas Hai, Usse Akele Mat Pee Jahiyo!

Delhite Girl 1 - Mere paas property Hai, Bangla Hai, Farm House Hai, bank balace hai, BMW Car hai tumhare paas kaya hai??
Delhite Girl 2- Oye Mere pass odd aur even number ke gadi wale 2 boyfriend...

Matrimonial AD in Delhi : Boy with even car number seeks
girl with odd car number- no bar on caste, religion

Ab Delhi me kundli or 36 gun milane se phle ye dekha jayega ki ladke aur ladki ki
Car ke even/odd number khi mel to nahi kha rahe hai!

Kuch log Facebook(Social Websites) par Dislike button se satisfied nahi hai
woh esa button chahte hai...
Jis par click karne se comment karne wale ke ghar kanooni notice pahuch jaaye

Bhartiya naari sanskaar wali hoti hai
Vo kabhi sabke samne apne pati ko
-Abe Gadhe
-Oye Gadhe
-Sun Gadhe
nahi bolti
esiliye wo short me
"A.G./O.G./Suno G. kahti hai"

1 halki si Muskuraht hazaaron dil jeet skti hai,Zara hass k to dekye
,,,,/////,,,,
(@ .. @)
(<IIIIII>)
aay haye!
aapne to Mehfil hi loot li...

Best tag line for IND vs PAK..Cricket Match 2016
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Time to bully the half lullies......cricket chutkula!

Kajriwaal sarkaar ka sabse bada phesla to "Sharab pine ki umar ko ghtana he hai"
aab modi sarkar laakh koshish kar le kabhi delhi me jeet nahi paayege....politics chutkule

Breaking news: "asharam bapu jail me bimar hai. 'Vitamin "she"' ki kami ho gai hai"

Mujhe to khud ki value tab hi pta chalti hai,
.
.
.
.
Jab mobile customer care wale kehte hai, "Aap ka call hmare liye important hai kripiya line pr bne rahe"

Bikini Bikini ke chakkar me Company to bikni hi the yaar(Mallya)

Suna hai 1 bank staff log bhi aandolan karne wale hai
vo kahte hai hum log- Oriental Bank of Commerce me kaam
karte hai to hume bhi OBC maana jaye

Jitne teji se aajkal sampo me vitamins, kaju, baadam, minerals paye ja rahe hai
Dar hai kisi din use Mid Day Meal ke menu me Shamil na kaar diya jaye

Smartphone rakhne wale chore girlfriend se jada
dhan to mobile data off Mobile data On krne me laga dete hai...

Santa: Our new neighbour is an Aam Aadmi Party member.
Banta: How do you know that?
Santa: Today morning, when I waved my hand to her, she showed me the 'Broom'!

When i am not able to decide between 'aap' and 'tu', I automatically switch to English

Bhookha marane nahin doonga aur Dusra Ambaani banane nahin doonga. Aapaka apana Modi.

ATM se jaakar aao to aas-pados vaale Shole ke gabbar singh kee tarah poochhate hain, "kitane aadamee the?"

If things will continue like this the government would have to introduce UDHAR card!

1 ladki ka college ke 1 ladke se chakkar tha
Ladki-Jaan tum mughe Rani kyo kahte ho?
Ladka haskar bola-kyoki Nokarani kahna lamba ho jata hai
Ladki- Pta hai me tumko Jaan kyo kahti hu?
Ladka-Kyo?
Ladki-haskar boli-kyoki Jaanwar kahna lamba ho jata hai

??'?'\????\=(.??)=/????/'?? ? ? ?
Etne din beet gaye koi chutkula nahi bheja Dost, chal goli kha.....